so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize