Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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