She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
