Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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