I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I would fuck him just for his dog
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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