Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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