My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
