her vagine was all disorganized.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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