i think my mom watched the whole time
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
