that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I have already put on my inside pants.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
