mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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