Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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