Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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