i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
no, he came in my armpit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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