No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize