You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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