I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
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True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
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Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
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