We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
When are your genitals available?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
