i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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