How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize