i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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