You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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