You insisted on take shots off of plates.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
