you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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