so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
