Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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