I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Mom said you looked used
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
