when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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