I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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