My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
