Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
