Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
