She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
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I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
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Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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