Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
