I puked a lego.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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