So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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