PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
