if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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