I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
