It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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