Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
