There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
