I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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