all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize