Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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