Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
