I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
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I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
They have beer where we have blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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