So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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