And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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