My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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