You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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