Where did you get a picture of my penis
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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